We are showered with so many ideas of what good sex is like. We see a lot of romantic movies displaying couples that are in sync with each other, without needing to talk about what exactly it is that they want, and they do not misunderstand each other’s sexual signals, without misreading any signs. They usually just easily get to bed in a romantic way and all the done. However, real life is completely different to what gets depicted in movies. In real life, it takes a lot of communication in order to honestly know what they like and prefer.

It is important to ask your partner what it is that helps get them excited, and how you can do that better. You should communicate what it is that makes them feel more loved, whether they prefer slow and gentle love making or having a “quickie”, or whether they want to try something new and different. It is important to give and get feedback in order to know how you both can improve how you give one another pleasure. In order for the sexual health of a relationship to improve, both partners need to communicate freely and openly about their needs and desires.

For many people though, sex is something that cannot be freely discussed. Other people end up feeling ashamed for having the desires and thoughts that are believed that they should be kept hidden. But wasting our time wondering whether our partners would share similar desires, it is a better option to talk to your partner about them and see if you can both be interested in similar fantasies.

You can try talking to your partner about role playing different characters, be open to discussing whether your partner is open to trying new things, or whether they are interested in introducing toys in their sexual life. Do not shy away from communicating your desires with your partner even though you may not have been keen in the beginning of your relationship. It is never too late to explore your fantasies. Regardless of whether your relationship is reasonably new or long-term, openly talking about sex with your partner is the way to having sexual satisfaction.

Studies show that couples who comfortably discuss their sex life are usually more sexually happy in their relationships compared to those who do not. Sexual satisfaction in relationships tends to general satisfaction and fulfillment in relationships. Being able to communicate about your sexuality allows couples to learn being freely open to communicating about other things in the relationship.

It is important to discuss what means more to us like whether we like a lot of kissing before, during and after being sexually intimate or whether we like to be held afterwards should be communicated effectively. It can be liberating telling your partner that you would like to be kinkier in the bedroom. Being honest about these facts can help us benefit both us and our relationships by satisfying us and improving the quality of our relationships.

Before starting a conversation with your partner, ensure that you know what you want and like personally. As you approach the topic with your partner, let go of stereotypes that each one might hold about sex and gender. What men are believed to like or what women are believed to like are not “one size fits all”. Therefore, both partners need to approach the conversation without assumptions and with an open mind.

Even when you know what your desires are, you may want to take some time to think through what your needs and wants are before talking to your partner about them. It is essential that you become comfortable with your own desires and accept them as they are. In order to be able to confidently talk about your desires and fantasies, you need to be fully comfortable and embrace them as a part of yourself. It is also important to also understand why you may be having those specific desires and fantasies. Knowing this will help you better express yourself to your partner and for them to better understand you.

Talking about your desires and fantasies with your partner does not have to be a serious and intense conversation. It can be approached as a simple and easy conversation about what you both most enjoy about your encounters. You can then discuss possible ways in which you can both try out to improve your sexual life. Throwing around ideas and what you would like to try out will help lighten up the conversation while simultaneously driving the point home.